Jeff
I know people always say that a good sex life is a lot harder with a baby, and they advise that you "make time" for sex. It sounds like good advise, but in practice I don't know how to do it.
We have a four-month-old boy who mostly sleeps through the night. In addition, both of us are hunting for new jobs and money is a near-constant stress. My wife will soon return to work, and we're not sure how we will pay for child care yet.
Furthermore, she's worried that she will get pregnant again, and is admitting that this is a stress for her as well.
With all these distractions (plus keeping the house clean), it seems like we can never get together on this. My wife says she doesn't even think about sex anymore. I find this pretty alarming. I still think about it, and I even try to romance her a bit (kissing, etc.) Sometimes this works, but not often.
We're having sex maybe every other week, but I think it's even less than that. What can I do to help improve things?
reddevil: I'm already doing all the things you suggest. Thanks for answering, but we've already done all that.
reddevil: I'm already doing all the things you suggest. Thanks for answering, but we've already done all that.
Heather D: We are using birth control -- condoms and the pill. She is still worried about getting pregnant again because the expense would be too much for us.
Peace of Mind: Thanks. I've tried almost that exact thing. I think she appreciates it, but it doesn't result in anything because (I think) she's still too worried and distracted.
Answer
Everyoneâs experiences make them an expert in their own right - so what is right for one couple may not be appropriate for another. Most couples wait for the magical 6 week mark and are dreadfully disappointed when that incredible pre birth sex doesnât happen... and then each time they have sex,'something' interupts the mood - be it crying baby, stress and concerns about getting preg again, pain or just plain lack of interest.
In now way are you alone in your concerns - nor is your wife "the only one". You have already had a myriad a of excellent advice and tips - so I won't revist these.
Especially with first babies, women can have a tendency to make their baby the centre of their universe. This often leaves little time to focus on, or be with their partner. This drought in every day intimacy and attention flows on to a coital hiatus. Nature, it seems, planned on this to ensure that
babies are well looked after and future pregnancies are spaced out.
The âdroughtâ can come from either partner and the disinterest in sex and intimacy, stems from a number of issues and conditions, which sadly is not discussed by even the closest of friends, much less the medical fraternity or the media. It may be through the rollercoaster of hormones pulsing through the womans body after birthing, and landing unsettled and unbalanced â causing low libido. Its possible the physical and emotional strain of caring for a young child is taking the toll on both your good natures, leaving little time for intimacy and closeness you shared before your baby came along. The financial strain, the unsettled feelings stemming from unexplored roles as a parent and the sheer exhaustion from being a new parent all contribute to the lack of intimacy and sex within a relationship. .The return to sexual intimacy needs to be in your own good time and not to rush it. Its important to make space and time to care and nurture yourself â something that as a new parent seems as easy as to fly to the moon. Lastly, the importance of including and communicating with your partner in paramount.
All women find that their libidio/desire for sex returns in differing amounts of time and intensity. This has a lot to do with the massive changes in a womans hormones after birthing. Again, rest, proper nutrition and emotional support will assist with this coming back to normal â but in some cases hormonal support may be required â and this can be gained from a naturopath â or from a medical practitioner.
And getting back to incredible sex? ( it is possible!!) It all depends I guess, on your birth experience and the damage ( physically and mentally) that you have endured and the meanings you place upon those experiences in relation to sex. My advice is to keep an open and honest communication link with your partner and take things slowly â with little pressure â and connect again with yourself as a sensual being, before attempting to touch another.
check out the blog and the forum on http://reclaimsexafterbirth.com which has a bunch of tips, questions and advice surrounding the things you have asked
best of luck!
Everyoneâs experiences make them an expert in their own right - so what is right for one couple may not be appropriate for another. Most couples wait for the magical 6 week mark and are dreadfully disappointed when that incredible pre birth sex doesnât happen... and then each time they have sex,'something' interupts the mood - be it crying baby, stress and concerns about getting preg again, pain or just plain lack of interest.
In now way are you alone in your concerns - nor is your wife "the only one". You have already had a myriad a of excellent advice and tips - so I won't revist these.
Especially with first babies, women can have a tendency to make their baby the centre of their universe. This often leaves little time to focus on, or be with their partner. This drought in every day intimacy and attention flows on to a coital hiatus. Nature, it seems, planned on this to ensure that
babies are well looked after and future pregnancies are spaced out.
The âdroughtâ can come from either partner and the disinterest in sex and intimacy, stems from a number of issues and conditions, which sadly is not discussed by even the closest of friends, much less the medical fraternity or the media. It may be through the rollercoaster of hormones pulsing through the womans body after birthing, and landing unsettled and unbalanced â causing low libido. Its possible the physical and emotional strain of caring for a young child is taking the toll on both your good natures, leaving little time for intimacy and closeness you shared before your baby came along. The financial strain, the unsettled feelings stemming from unexplored roles as a parent and the sheer exhaustion from being a new parent all contribute to the lack of intimacy and sex within a relationship. .The return to sexual intimacy needs to be in your own good time and not to rush it. Its important to make space and time to care and nurture yourself â something that as a new parent seems as easy as to fly to the moon. Lastly, the importance of including and communicating with your partner in paramount.
All women find that their libidio/desire for sex returns in differing amounts of time and intensity. This has a lot to do with the massive changes in a womans hormones after birthing. Again, rest, proper nutrition and emotional support will assist with this coming back to normal â but in some cases hormonal support may be required â and this can be gained from a naturopath â or from a medical practitioner.
And getting back to incredible sex? ( it is possible!!) It all depends I guess, on your birth experience and the damage ( physically and mentally) that you have endured and the meanings you place upon those experiences in relation to sex. My advice is to keep an open and honest communication link with your partner and take things slowly â with little pressure â and connect again with yourself as a sensual being, before attempting to touch another.
check out the blog and the forum on http://reclaimsexafterbirth.com which has a bunch of tips, questions and advice surrounding the things you have asked
best of luck!
BABY Ferret Making Noise In Sleep?
I got this brand new 4 month old ferret at Petco today. He is a normal ferret. I'm new to the fuzzball world and was wondering why he's making weird noises in his sleep. Its like when he was dooking earlier before, but now he's asleep in his hammock. Are the noises just him snoring?
But ferrets do sometimes make noises when they're awake. It's called dooking. Or at least thats what I thought..
He's also very boney. I'm not sure if thats normal or not. He hasn't eaten any of the food I put out for him, nor has he drunk from the waterbottle. I'm not sure if these details help because I haven't even had him for over a day
Answer
I have two new baby ferrets (7 weeks old) and they make noises all the time in their sleep! It sounds a little like a creaking gate. they often do it when they're stretching in their sleep.
I think it's perfectly normal, as they're eating, sleeping and playing normally.
As for the eating, you need to make sure that he gets plenty of food. It may need some experimentation with different types of food because they don't like their diets changing. Try him on a little cooked chicken (no bones) or raw chicken (bones are fine in raw chicken). He might prefer it minced. Or, if he's on kibble, try soaking it in a little warm water for a while to soften it up. If this doesn't work, try some kitten milk (NOT cows or cat milk). If none of this works, take him to the vet immediately. Once they start not eating, it can be very difficult to get them started again. You may need to feed him by syringe (not pleasant, and you should have some help from an experienced ferret handler).
He shouldn't be at all skinny - mine have tubby little bellies on them!
Hope you have luck getting the little one to eat.
I have two new baby ferrets (7 weeks old) and they make noises all the time in their sleep! It sounds a little like a creaking gate. they often do it when they're stretching in their sleep.
I think it's perfectly normal, as they're eating, sleeping and playing normally.
As for the eating, you need to make sure that he gets plenty of food. It may need some experimentation with different types of food because they don't like their diets changing. Try him on a little cooked chicken (no bones) or raw chicken (bones are fine in raw chicken). He might prefer it minced. Or, if he's on kibble, try soaking it in a little warm water for a while to soften it up. If this doesn't work, try some kitten milk (NOT cows or cat milk). If none of this works, take him to the vet immediately. Once they start not eating, it can be very difficult to get them started again. You may need to feed him by syringe (not pleasant, and you should have some help from an experienced ferret handler).
He shouldn't be at all skinny - mine have tubby little bellies on them!
Hope you have luck getting the little one to eat.
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Title Post: Married with a baby: How do you make time for sex?
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Rating: 95% based on 95 ratings. 4.8 user reviews.
Author: Unknown
Thanks To Visiting My Blog
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